Thank you, Nancy

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Happy Easter. Happy Pesach. Or perhaps, just Happy Sunday.
In Madison it’s a beautiful, blue sky and sunny day.

My neurons were firing on all cylinders last night. That’s great if you’re sleeping and dreaming, but not so much when you’re awake and tossing and turning.  I thought about a Linkedin request I received a few days ago. “Nancy” wanted to reconnect because she has a new job. Nancy is a friend on FB, so I’ve watched her kids grow up in photos. I wonder if they’re celebrating Easter together today.

Today many families will celebrate. Grandparents, parents, “kids” and grandkids will get to spend precious time together and give thanks for all that is important in their lives. Like these families, ours has many reasons to give thanks. One of the reasons is for the “Nancys” in our lives. Those individuals who share their kindness and love and who have helped us keep precious memories close.

The reason Nancy had my mind buzzing was a note she sent to me in May of 2007, the year that my oldest son, Paul, was killed. Nancy’s email is indelibly etched in my mind because we read it to close Paul’s memorial services in Boston and Minneapolis. And perhaps of even more importance, I’ve read it to hundreds and hundreds of law enforcement officers as we train and explain how a police pursuit decision can inexorably alter lives.

So today, I just wanted to say, “Thanks, Nancy!”

To: Farris, Jonathan
Sent: Mon, May 28, 2007  19:51:05

Hello Mr. Farris,

Please let me start by expressing my deepest sympathy for you and your family. I can’t imagine what you must be going through, really.

I knew Paul for only a short time. I interviewed him for the job he just started two weeks ago, and was amazed in every way with him…I knew before the interview was over that I had to hire him, and furthermore, I wanted him in my unit, and he did start and join my unit.

I’ve worked at MetLife Auto & Home for 23 years…I started there when I was 21. I was nothing like him when I was his age. I’ve never interviewed anyone like him. But I don’t have to tell you, he was your son.

I have 3 sons of my own, ages 5, 9 and 11. I went home after working with Paul after a few days and told my sons all about him, and how amazing this “new guy” was, and how inspired I was by him, and how lucky they would be to grow up to be like him. He was just perfect – smart, motivated, outgoing, handsome, talented, friendly…everything a 23 year old could possibly be. Yes, I only knew him two weeks, but he really touched me, and I am deeply saddened by this.

I didn’t know how to contact you, since the office was closed for the holiday, so I found Cathy C through Google. She gave me your cell phone number, too, but honestly, I could not speak to you right now without breaking down. I am interested in any arrangements that will be made, and I will, of course notify the proper contacts in the Human Resources Dept to contact you. Again, I am so sorry for your and your family’s loss. If you need to reach me, my work number is 800-854-xxxx.
My cell # is 603-xxx-xxxx, and my work email is This is my home email, which you can also use.

If there is absolutely anything I can do for you, please let me know, anything.


adminThank you, Nancy

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